It has been just over a year since I opened my blog. A year since I opened my heart onto 'paper' and let all the thoughts and feelings out. And my goodness, what a year it has been. I almost don't know where to start... I guess I'll remind you of who I am, I …
So I don't look back...It, it hurts with every heartbeat...It, it hurts with every heartbeat... So it hurts, it hurts like hell but you are told you have to. You have to keep trying you have to keep fighting. Fighting for your family, your children and then for yourself. But what are you fighting for? …
Continue reading We can keep trying but things will never change…
So please, just give me something for the pain...And I want youOh my god, I want youTo see me in this stateAnd I want youFill your sleep and haunt youTo see the mess you've madeYou've madeAnd I want youAnd all my dreams are no useWhen I am wide awakeAnd I want toBelieve I haven't lost …
Continue reading Maybe I’m restless, a manic depressive. Or maybe I need someone, or maybe not…
It takes you by the handAnd leaves you nowhereYou feel it in your nervesIt's choking out the sunYou try in vain to be persuadedThat it's nothing... Living my life with a chronic mental health condition; Bipolar Type 1 is quite honestly the worst thing that I have ever had to deal with. Sounds dramatic right, …
Continue reading Don’t you understand? Your mind is not your friend again…
I've been holding onto pieces, swimming in the deep end.Trying to find my way back to you 'cause I'm needingA little bit of love... We have all been there, haven't we? Bound and broken, on the floor, inconsolable crying, screaming, needing something from someone, anyone. For me, more recently I have needed my Mum. Desperately …
...Home is whenever I'm with you... WOW, I can hardly believe I am sitting here writing this, after a long long time of complete silence on here. Where on earth do I start. I have, (we have) just about survived the first year and a half of a world wide pandemic, I have (me and …
The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return. - Moulin Rouge To love is, in my opinion; is one of the greatest things, we as humans can do.There are so many different forms of love and not all of them are the ones that we want or desire, …
Life has never felt like more of a rollercoaster than it does right now. I have never felt more lost, lonely, confused, loved in some ways, left out in some others, wanted by some, yet rejected by most. I have never wanted validation more. Why though? I am so many 'things' to so many different …
WooooaaahhhhhGot to learn to let it go. Grief, what a horrible beast you are. At least that is what I have thought for the nearly 10 years I have had to face you. Before my Dad Steve passed away I was happily sailing through life without too many cares in the world. I had just …
Continue reading I think it’s time to practice what I preach, exorcise the demons inside me…
What a whirlwind of a world we are living in at the moment. I do not even know where to start with what has happened in my life since my last post.. Back in September?!? I have sat down and tried to write something for so long and words have failed me. So why now? …
Being Becka 